Back in Time
Suddenly had the thought of reading my July posts exactly a year ago, and i can't help but admit, it was quite a good read! Ha... It chronicled the near-end of my student life, just before I started work (and even the interview).
What I am/experiencing now that is different from July 2003:
- i've a job
- i'm not free anymore (still want to watch horses race and the Omni-max corel reef show but guess it's over forever already)
- 16 blog posts vs. 5 posts (evidence of the aforementioned point)
Some things which are pretty much still the same:
- "The fear of studying when i'm older; of not being talented in this area to achieve much or worse, anything, out of it; of not having enough money to pay for my dream AND my life... of not fulfilling or even trying at achieving something because of all the of-nots. I don't know if that will be something i can and will realise one day, but somehow, to me, this is an important step to the whole process of living. Constantly figuring out what this life has in store for me and what i want to make out of it. I will only have this one chance to live it out... with as few regrets." (Come on, QY - figure it out FAST!)
- Ha, i would still want to learn how to make real coffee.
- "Was sharing with a friend about the inhumane behaviour of some employers who lash out at their employees. I can never understand how an adult, can do that to another adult at the workplace." This is still what i believe. But unfortunately, it has happened to me before and to my colleagues. And sad to say, no one said nothing.
What made me pause and think:
- "Not that i've always wanted to be a writer, but i guess the same desire to do something more than just to earn money and live is there. The desire to want to make a difference in this huge world." But what's the use of a dormant desire that is suppressed by a rushing reality...? Sometimes it's like hopping on to a treadmill... running but going nowhere. Sheesh.
I'm not sure, but if there were a way of measuring the level of happiness, i think i was happier the same time last year. Maybe at this moment, at least.
And at this moment, the lyrics of Kry's "Take My Hand and Walk" speak exactly what I feel and tell me exactly what I needed to hear:
I know there are times, your dreams turn to dust
You wonder as you cry, why it has to hurt so much
Give Me all your sadness, someday you will know the reason why
With a child-like heart, simply put your hope in Me
Take My hand and walk where I lead, keep your eyes on Me alone
Don't you say why were the old days better, just because you're scared of the unknown
Take My hand and walk
Don't live in the past, cause yesterday's gone
Wishing memories would last, you're afraid to carry on
You don't know what's comin', but you know the one who holds tomorrow
I will be your guide, take you through the night
If you keep your eyes on Me
Take My hand and walk where I lead, keep your eyes on me alone
Don't you say why were the old days better, just because you're scared of the unknown
Take My hand and walk where I lead, you will never be alone
Faith is to be sure of what you hope for, and the evidence of things unseen
So take My hand and walk
Just like a child
Holding daddy's hand, don't let go of mine
You know you can't stand on your own
[Inspired by Hebrews 11]
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